Chasing the winter
by albanachthoin
Summary: Steve Rogers goes after Bucky after he can't stop thinking about him. What happens when memories of the past collide with the present situations? [Post Winter Soldier time line, Stucky NSFW]


Falcon had been completely right in every sense of the word. Steve was going after Bucky. It was unusual for him, on a whim to just up and leave. No word to anyone, not the avengers and definitely not Fury. They could manage without him. He knew he had to do this. If not for himself, but for everyone around him. Without closure, the past encounter was going to drive him insane. /~until the end of the line~/ the words seemed to echo in his head. Conversations and past memories playing on like a broken record as he drove down the desolate highway. Finally thinking he may have a lead, he killed the bike, stopping to kick the kickstand down and pulling his helmet off. "You can do this." The words seemed almost hollow as he fixed the shield on his back, starting up towards the abandoned cabin it'd been rumored he was at. "Bucky!" He called out loudly, bringing his hand up to knock on the door with a loud thump.  
Moments seemed to pass before he'd given up on waiting, bringing his foot up to kick in the door, stepping over it. The area was too quiet for his liking, but a light in the back room caught his attention. "Bucky?" He called out again, slowly taking the corner, feeling as if his heart was going to beat out of his chest with suspense. What was he expecting to happen? What was he hoping to find?

It wasn't long before he got his answer, there in the center of the room, rested the one he'd came to find. Files and papers scattered amongst the floor, one file particular clenched in his hand.

"James..?" Steve finally tried with a shaky breath, approaching the man with an extra caution. "I'm not here to fight you.. I just thought.." He needed to quit tripping over his words, get his head together.

"Thought what? Who are you? Why do I know you?" He clutched the papers tighter in his hand. His whole body seemed wracked with exhaution, nothing but confusion passing over him.

"I'm Steve Rogers.. and you are James Buchanan Barnes. You're my best friend. That's why you know me...that's why I'm here now." He seemed almost prepared for some sort of retaliation, but he didn't reach for his shield or even clench up.

"You've said that already, but that proves nothing!" The winter soldier pushed to a completely standing position, wavering on his feet. Exhaustion was worse than he thought. "You are here because of friendship...?"

Steve was still prepared for retaltion but one look at Bucky's state and was clear the man was not well. With a step forward, a firm grip was placed on his shoulder, guiding the male back onto the couch. "Yes and it seems you need that more than ever. I could recount everything, from the day we met up until.." The fall. No, he couldn't bring that at up. Pain flashed acrossed his face but instead, he took his seat right beside the man. Carefully taking the papers away and tossing them off to the side. "Up until you were lost and then the day you were seen again. I'm not going to flood you with information, we're going to focus on bringing you back to the man I remember."

Bucky was just left there staring at this guy who had waltzed in, who'd been his target, that claimed to be his friend. His head was spinning, everything was too much, even the shock the touch to his shoulder seemed to send through him. "Yeah..let's start with that.." He agreed lowly, pulling his gaze away as Rogers was already on his way to the kitchen. Once alone, he leaned back against the couch, a heavy sigh leaving him. His eyes glancing to the metal arm he possessed. All the flashbacks, the way he wanted to refuse he was anything more than a weapon but weapons didn't have friends, let alone best friends. Who was this guy? Overloaded with information, the soldier began to drift into sleep.

It'd felt like hours had passed, as if he'd been sleeping on that couch for ages when that voice was waking him up. His eyes struggling to open, only to be met by blue ones that seemed to be watching him. "What?"

"Nothing.. I was just letting you rest, ready to eat?"

"Don't do that.." He muttered, pushing to sit up. "Shit.." He grunted, hand reaching out for the food. His eyes glancing to the sandwich, a smirk almost tugging on his lips. "Make this yourself?" Bucky was almost close to laughing and he wasn't even sure why a sandwich being made was funny and Steve was just giving him a stupid grin and a light yes ringing from his lips. James only made a face before he began to eat, the silence deafening in the room.

"So?" Steve was the one to finally break the silence, looking over him expectantly.

"So what?"

"So how was it?" He seemed almost to excited to know how Bucky had liked the sandwich.

Bucky was confused and he sat the remainder of the food down on the plate, swallowing what was left in his mouth. "...tastes like a sandwich...?"

This seemed to cause a laughter to raise from the blonde, almost making him fall over in complete amusement. "I am glad you remember what a sandwich tastes like...now...let's start on a haircut and a shower.."

"Why? Are you going to make sure I do such a thing? Maybe offer a hand?" He seemed to have a bit of humor returning to him and his mental state was starting to relax a little. Maybe he'd been right about it being his best friend and the look Steve was giving him seemed ready to kill. "Oh come on, I was kidding. I wouldn't want you in my shower anyways."

Steve looked to him, starting to make a retort. "What? Of course not, I don't know when the last time you showered was and I don't know what filth you've been rolling in, better not to get that on me. So go, holler if you really do need that hand."

It was a moment before Bucky moved, starting to head off towards the shower, pausing when he heard Steve asking him not to miss him too much. Why would he do that? He just shook it off, closing the door to the bathroom behind him. Water was started and he began to undress, barely glimpsing at the scars in the mirror when he'd passed it. The water was warm and relaxing against his skin, but his mind was wandering. Down to the man on the couch, the one who was waiting on him. He'd came all this way for him, made him food and was trying to get him put him back together. This was overwhelming. What did any of it even mean. His hand went out to grip the wall, trying to steady himself. Hell, he didn't even remember what he was supposed to be doing. "Steve?!" He called out, almost panicked as his legs gave out, hitting his knees. "STEVE!" He yelled out loudly, panic rising in his chest, the memories flooding his brain.

Steve wasn't expecting Bucky to need him, it was just a shower but with the thud and then the screaming that followed? He was off that couch before Bucky could say his name a third time. Woops, he'd broken down the door again. Without any thought to it, he'd rushed over to the tub, tossing back the curtain, carefully pulling Bucky into his arms. "Hey, Hey. I'm here. James."

It was reassuring and the feeling of the arms, Bucky collapsed against him. "..I remember.." He said, body supported by the side of the tub, his head against Steve's shoulder. "I remember you.. and you kept your promises.." His voice was shaky, pushing away slightly, staring into the eyes of Captain America. Words couldn't process what he was thinking. His wet hands went out to grasp his face, lips colliding with the others in a shaky breath.

Time stood still. Steve was shocked, Bucky was shaking. Did he push him away? This was his best friend. This wasn't.. but it felt good. His hand tangling in Bucky's hair, the kiss was returned, Steve leaning into it with almost as much want as the man who rested there. "I'm glad you remember.." He whispered, starting to pull away from the kiss, gently pushing Bucky back into the shower. "You fine now?" He asked, stepping towards the door.

Bucky wasn't fine though. He'd been shocked by what he'd done but he didn't regret it. He looked up to Steve, water falling in his eyes. "Will you stay?"

He had looked back, staring at the man and then back to the door. Scarred and naked and wet. He looked pitiful and.. Steve get yourself together. "I'll stay.." He moved to sit on the edge of the tub. "Have you rinsed?" Bucky's head only shook, not able to admit he didn't know what Steve meant. Cap only sighing as he reached out for the soap, not ready to tackle the conversation of what had just happened. The soap was squeezed into his hands, starting to wash the other's hair. "Honestly, I should have just joined you.."

"Who said it was too late now?" Bucky asked, turning to look up at him but only get his head turned back down rather quickly. "What?"

"Keep your head down and close your eyes or it's going to burn." Steve felt like this was as bad as bathing a kid, helping him rinse the soap out and careful of his eyes. Bucky was going to need be washed... With a sigh of defeat, he was up on his feet, standing up to put the door back in its place because he could at least feel he had privacy in a completely empty house before he was stripping of the clothes he wore and stepping into the tub. Helping Bucky onto his feet. "Just stay faced that way." He explained, reaching for a washcloth. He began to wash his body, focusing only on the task of what he was doing, getting the other clean. The cloth brought over his shoulders and down his back, being brought up as his arms came around to begin washing Bucky's chest. Wow.. it was much more musuclar than he thought. His hand was almost lingering too long.

"Steve...what's poking me?" Bucky went to twist around but Steve was more aware of the situation now than anything. He had backed up quickly, pulling the wash cloth in front of him as if it was going to offer anything.

"I think.. I think it was my knee., you should rinse .. don't.. turn around..."

"That didn't feel like a knee.." But Bucky was going to let him believe what he wanted, taking to rinsing the soap off his body, only glancing back out of the corner of his eye to confirm his suspicions. His lips tugging into a little smirk. With the soap washed off, he let out a sigh. "Steve it's okay, we're both men. I know what a boner is."

Was it hot in the shower or were his cheeks just turning red for no reason? Steve was lit up like the red on his shield. "It's not that. It's just.." But he didn't really have much time to argue, a hand was tugging on his wrist, guiding it out of the way, his eyes locking with Bucky's. Confusion passed over his face. "Buck..we..no.."

"Yes, we can just close your eyes.." He was quick to say, finding himself back on his knees but this time for a different reason. His hand had taken the male's dick, starting to stroke it as his tongue licked at the tip. He'd not expected such a musical noise to leave the protesting super soldier but Rogers seemed way more into it than he'd first let on. It encouraged him to continue. Sucking on the tip until he'd began to take him more, hand working in rhythm to cover what his mouth didn't cover. Eyes never seeming to leave Steve as he wanted to take in his pleasure. The firm grip of the man's hand in his hair only making him want to work more. He was left suckling and licking at the hardened shaft, losing himself in the moans of the other, he'd missed the warning. The quick release of cum against his tongue making him pull back, turning to cough. "Fuck.. a warning.."

"I gave you a warning! You shouldn't have started without asking me!"

"Are you going to really gripe about a blow job?"

Steve stared at him, still breathless. "No.. I'm not griping.." He was just fixed on the man who was still on his kness, noticing the problem he seemed to be having himself. It was right to return the favor wasn't it? He let go of his hair, reaching out to take his shoulder, helping James up onto his feet. They seemed frozen. Staring at each other before Steve was leaning in, lips brushing his in a cautious manner before it became deeper, relaxing in the kiss, one wrapped around his waist to press their bodies close, the other gripping his cock. It was slow strokes as they stood under the water, kissing and learning each others bodies. Steve's body something Bucky couldn't get enough, hands running over his chest then down to his hips and back to grip his ass as Steve seemed to almost be doing the same to him.

How long were they just going to stand around? Steve was starting to lose it, he twisted to pin him up against the wall, his hand sliding down to his ass, a finger beginning to press into him. The moan rang out and echoed in the walls of the shower when he felt the finger inside of him. Bucky's body giving in easily. Steve seemed to know what he was doing and he trusted him. It was a slow building pleasure, making him arch and almost gasp for more. "Steve.." His breath managed out, precum beginning to drip down his cock. "I..."

Each moan and gasp from him only made it that much harder to resist, his finger pressing deeper before he pulled out, leaving Bucky to pant. He needed to find something.

With a light curse, he was out of the shower, digging through drawers, until a jar of lube was found. He wasn't going to ask how it even got there. His fingers dipping into it quickly and beginning to slide it up his length. He moved back into the shower, eyes looking over Bucky again. Bucky only resting back against the wall, heavy in breath.

"You going to fuck me now or I am going to have to do it myself, Star spangled?"

"Don't call me that.." Steve was trying to not groan at his words, his hands reaching out to take his hips and guide the man to turn around. Pressing him against the wall, one hand resting on his shoulder, the other on his waist, he began to press into him. His walls were tight around the tip of his cock and the way he moaned. He was trying to find the strength to control him. He was slow to enter, making sure James was adjusting to him.

"Keep going..." Bucky rasped out, hand pressing firmly against the wall as his head fell forward, hips starting to press back on him, trying to encourage him to fuck him. It was then that the thrusts started and his breath was increasing with a hitch. "Shit.. Steve.. yes.." He groaned out, grinding back with each movement. Pleasure building in him. His hand was reaching down to stroke himself when it became too much. "Steve. Steve.." He tried to warn, begging the other to not stop as his body tensed and rocked back, the staggering heat of his orgasm running through him and leaving him in a quick burst, feeling the wet seed coating his hand and down the wall. His face was probably red now.

Steve felt the orgasm of the other man, slowing his thrusts to a deep, slow movement inside him, his hand running down his back. "James.." He groaned under his breath, his hips moving until his cock pulsed with his own orgasm, causing him to start sliding out. Some being leaking inside of his best friend as the rest was caught by his thighs and the bottom of the tub, leaving both of them to come rest on the bottom of the tub, panting and out of air.

Bucky was resting on Rogers' chest with his arms wrapped around him, neither of them knowing what to say to the other.


End file.
